John Alejandro King Quote #1
11% of Americans believe HTML is a sexually transmitted disease. In reality, HTML is caused by bacteria living in the lower bowel.
John Alejandro King Quote #2
A double standard is a scandal. A single standard is an atrocity.
John Alejandro King Quote #3
A good plan today is better than a perfect plan tomorrow? Trying your good plan tomorrow is the perfect plan today.
John Alejandro King Quote #4
A guy applied to the CIA
And in his application form, he left every question blank
When the recruiter asked him why he did this, the guy responded:
“If you don’t hire me, it doesn't matter anyway
But if you hire me, the answers are all classifiedJohn Alejandro King Quote #5
A key sociological factor underlying the prevalence of zombies as a theme in modern culture is that zombie movies are cheap as hell to make.
John Alejandro King Quote #6
A stone trips you. A daisy reaches up and pulls you down.
John Alejandro King Quote #7
A typical breakfast for a CIA ops officer consists of a pastry and a piping hot cup of Armageddon.
John Alejandro King Quote #8
A woman called my phone and asked “Is this the suicide prevention hotline?” I said “Ultimately, that question can only be answered by you.
John Alejandro King Quote #9
Aging is about mind over matter – every year my matter drops another quarter inch below my mind.
John Alejandro King Quote #10
All is not lost – so why the hell should it stop to ask for directions???
John Alejandro King Quote #11
All my memories seem to happen to music. Memories of my mother and father; waking up early on Christmas morning; the little apartment we lived in above the disco.
John Alejandro King Quote #12
Always write your signature move in disappearing ink.
John Alejandro King Quote #13
Am I the only person who thinks the theory of solipsism is totally stupid?
John Alejandro King Quote #14
Am I the only person who thinks the theory of solipsism is totally stupid?
... Hello?John Alejandro King Quote #15
Angry poor people are 'enraged.' Angry rich people are 'livid.
John Alejandro King Quote #16
Any first-year analyst can tell you what's happening. But it takes a seasoned intelligence professional to show that nothing's happening at all.
John Alejandro King Quote #17
Anybody I can hold a candle to, I drip hot wax on.
John Alejandro King Quote #18
Anything worth doing is worth neither confirming nor denying having done.
John Alejandro King Quote #19
Anything worth doing' is a problematic premise.
John Alejandro King Quote #20
As a conservative, while I oppose the invasion of privacy, I fully support the privatization of that invasion.
John Alejandro King Quote #21
As long as espionage is less expensive than remotely controlling people’s brains, CIA will continue to remotely control people’s brains.
John Alejandro King Quote #22
Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your R&B.
John Alejandro King Quote #23
Back in the day, before he was president, you just know James Madison's homies called him JMad.
John Alejandro King Quote #24
Be levelheaded, that your head be not leveled.
John Alejandro King Quote #25
Being diagnosed with spatial orientation phenomenon can turn a person’s whole world upside up.
John Alejandro King Quote #26
Birds don't sing after a storm, they sing before the next one.
John Alejandro King Quote #27
By stripping it of natural moisturizers, ethnic cleansers leave your ethnicity dry, wrinkled and flaky.
John Alejandro King Quote #28
Charles Schultz: Don't be afraid the world will end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia.
The Covert Comic: I’ve been calling Australia all morning, and there's no answer.John Alejandro King Quote #29
CIA analysis: the too soon joke that predates the event.
John Alejandro King Quote #30
CIA. Global, mobile, with a cause that's noble.
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